Here’s the thing, my novel is complete and is being prepared to be “launched.” That doesn’t mean that it’s coming out soon. It’s not, it’s coming out next winter. But it has been sent out for endorsements from other authors that will appear on the cover of the book. My agent sent the book out to two authors who were kind enough to read it promptly and then reward me with just the most flattering blurbs. I don’t think I’m allowed to reveal them yet but it’s a great relief to get their feedback.
Now the manuscript is being copy-edited and the publisher is working on cover ideas, promotion strategies, etc., and I’m always on the slightly anxious/obsessive end of the spectrum, so in order to not obsess about what’s going on with my book, I’ve decided to focus my extreme tunnel vision on real estate.
I love real estate. I’m a real estate junkie. When I’m depressed or anxious, I turn to cruising real estate websites the way others turn to porn. I guess you could say it excites me. Arouse might not be too strong a word. Titillate would be too strong, but you could say arouse.
So when we came to Los Angeles last week, I made a few appointments to look at homes. Denis was interested, he’s been out here a lot and we decided to see what’s on the market. Denis hates the traffic in LA and we both like the country – we have the dogs and horses – so we decided to look in the Topanga/Malibu areas. The morning that we were to meet the broker, we drove up through the Malibu hills first and we instantly settled into our old dynamic in which Denis feels he must try to quell my unmitigated enthusiasm with hefty doses of annoying reality.
“Look at the views,” I cried out, as we ascended a steep, winding road. “And it never snows, so you’d never feel stranded up here.”
“No, it never snows, you just have to figure out how to drive it when the road cracks open during an earthquake, and there’s a fire raging all around you. Imagine driving this through a blazing inferno and then you’ll get a picture of what it’s like to live here.”
“No screens,” I marveled as we toured a beautiful cottage. ”No bugs!”
“Nope, no bugs, just the giant tsunami that will cover this whole valley after the quake. You’ll have fish swimming above your bed, but no bugs.”
Denis’s naysaying, as always, spurred me on and we ended up in a constant dialogue of pros and cons about the area, with Devin trying to act as the voice of reason with her reminders of our families back East and friends and pets, etc. We ended up dropping Denis back at the hotel and Devin and I decided to do drive to the Venice area to look in some shops. At one point, I needed to change lanes at a traffic light, but there was a car next to me with salsa music blasting. Dev informed me that the driver was politely waving me in front of her, instead of blocking my way, East Coast style.
“See that?” I said. “People never do that in New York. People who are courteous to other drivers are happy people. People are happy in California.”
“I think that driver is happy because she’s eating corn,” said Devin.
“She’s eating popcorn?”
“No, she’s eating corn on the cob,” Devin replied, and I leaned over her for a look and sure enough, the jolly driver was eating corn on the cob, while driving her car. She was bobbing her head in time with the music, carving neat rows on the cob with her teeth, balancing the steering wheel with her elbows and when butter started dripping down her chin, she simply dabbed at it WITH THE BIB that was tied about her neck.
People, this is a very, very special place.
The best part of our Los Angeles visit was seeing our friend Peter Gallagher perform in his one-man show at the Geffen center. It was a fundraiser for the Actors Fund and the Geffen Center and it was AMAZING. Peter sang and told hilarious stories about all the people he’s worked with in the theater and in films over the years: Peter O’Toole, Jack Lemmon, Mike Nichols, Glenn Close, Annette Bening. He sang songs that brought tears to our eyes. And afterward we got to visit with Peter’s wife Paula, one of my favorite people on earth, whom I’ve missed terribly since they moved to LA, and their two gorgeous and talented kids.
Now we’re in San Francisco. In the pouring rain. I understand that it’s sunny and 60 at home. Sigh.
It’s almost tropical here in CT, yes, but the mosquitos are starting to surface.
Crying-laughing at THE BIB line. Ann, you are HILARIOUS. (Now come home already please.)
the corn on the cob moment is screaming for a movie to make it a scene!
love 60 + sunny in RI
I would have loved to be that real estate agent! Anyway can’t wait for the new book.
It’s been beautiful here in CT. Riding outside every day. Perfect weather. Your horse looks awesome. He misses you and wants you to stay in CT..at least that’s what he told me. Miss you..Denis is right..Too many fires and earthquakes in California. See you soon!
Loved this! Cruising property websites, I’ve got the same obsession. Islands for sale, too. Corn and bib on the road sounds about right.
Ha, Ann, watch out, you’re going to talk yourself and the family into a move west after all!
So jealous. Love California and Peter Gallagher…will you be going to Napa? That’s my favorite place in the country. Loved the post!
It sounds like Venice.
Gloria
Hey Ann.. We were back stage in Peters dressing room when he was doing “Long Days Journey into Night” my friend dated his cousin… and I made out with K Spacey…oh the 80′s ( area,heartbreak the clubs).. He was a sweet guy!
So glad you got to see Sausalito. And what about that GG Bridge and the views! Just so you know, it’s very unusual to have rain here this time of year. Also, it only snows in the mountains (Lake Tahoe -which is a mere 3 hrs away.) And, you’re right – no bugs / no screens!
Enjoy the rest of your stay in our fair state.
Linda S.
Isn’t there a DWEC law in California? Driving While Eating Corn. At least she was wearing her bib.
It sounds like you’re all having a great time, despite the potential natural disasters, like fish swimming over your head.
Somewhere, in a parallel universe, on a blog maintained by a well-known New England-based comedian, actor, and all-around smart-ass, is a new blog entry that begins, “I’m out in Los Angeles on vacation with my family, and my dear wife Ann is drivin’ me effin’ crazy…she’s dragging me all around the effin’ area to look at houses that I have no intention of ever moving into….”
Good one, Alan. Hahaha!
There’s no place like New England in the springtime anyway.
Funny stuff about the canyons and random Cali life.
Congrats on the book’s progress!
This really had me laughing. You have distilled down EXACTLY what it’s like when I am in LA.
Haha! Corn??? OMG! Just gross! I wonder yet again if it is a leo thing, I ADORE real estate ( my profession) , I also think it is a man/husband thing when they see the wife excited to be the nay sayer…..*sigh*.
I have been to La and Malibu, but never San Fran and I really want to go and visit, have fun and i look forward to hearing all about it and seeing some pictures!
Glad to you got to see a dear friend, always good for the soul….. Oh and it has been 60 plus, my parents are here visiting and we have even hit 74 a few times… just stunning! Thats the east coast for ya, it will tease you and play with your mind if you leave, even for a few days
That is one very pretty picture. As usual, very funny story.
Now I’m hungry for corn
I LOVE the Topanga/Malibu area!!
Now to the important stuff!!! I met SNOOPY!! I love him!! I also met KC’s “marble”. LOVE THE “MARBLE EVEN MORE!”
Have a great time in the bay!!
AW, how is dear Snoopy? Have you moved back here Cynthia?
Congratulations on the book, the trip, and the corn spotting! Can’t wait for my turn at all 3.
I do the same thing with real estate properties! I also watch House Hunters a little too often
Is it true there isn’t any bugs in that area? Does that include ticks?! Because I have had enough of ticks in CT!
*aren’t
I love this story. It’s very true about the Santa Anna fires and winds and it’s also quite beautiful in Malibu. I can imagine seeing all that with the beautiful ocean would seduce anyone in wanting to move there.. I was thinking about moving to Laguna Beach but a couple of friends who live in that area stated they have many rainy seasons, what state doesn’t now a days, the fires, last earthquake was in the 90′s. I remember Suzanne Somers stating her home burned down 3 times already and she rebuilt on the same land every time it happened. They said they were so in love with the property they live in in Malibu that she didn’t want to lose the land. I can’t blame her. The area is nothing more than stunning to wake up seeing that beautiful ocean and acres of land as well. I guess there are pros and cons to everything. I think New England is so gorgeous though. I know CA has great things as well, but they seem to have to have everything aesthetically perfect. I doubt you would see a woman who hasn’t had so much work done because of the fact if you don’t you’re the one who seems to be the odd ball.. I hate that. Why does it have to be so plastic. Nothing wrong with freshening up, facials, etc., but when you see everyone unable to move their faces and they state they have had nothing done at all. I find it so insanely ridiculous. If you’re going to do anything, and let me preface this with stating, any woman or man should be able to do whatever they want to themselves, plastic surgery-wise, if it makes THEM feel good about themselves, not because society expects it of them. I feel bad about that. I do because I hear so many women say they feel less than unless they have had breast implants, botox, you name it. I don’t feel the same way. Unfortunately some of my friends have fallen for it and I don’t know what to say. Some are regreful and they’re only in their 30′s. So much at such a young age.. But what are you going to do. I guess it’s everyones own personal choice. I just hope they don’t all end up looking like Joan Rivers. I think she’s great, but she has overdone it by a thousand percent..