Yesterday I returned from the city just in time to feed the horses. As soon as I parked the car, I opened the door to the house and the dogs came tumbling out and we all started jogging up to the barn.
The horses get very excited at feeding time. If they are in the lower field and see the dogs and me approach they come galloping up the hill and meet us at the fence:
Yesterday, however, as I approached their fence, they did their usual canter up the hill, but when they reached the top, still about 20 feet away from the barn, they all came to a slamming halt. Then, their necks raised like giraffes, their ears pricked forward and their eyes wide with alarm, they started blowing and snorting with fright. They were staring at a spot just above my head – at the field behind me it seemed, and suddenly they all wheeled around at once and galloped back down the hill. I didn’t even look behind me. I just ran into the barn, the dogs tearing in after me. After the discussion here yesterday I was sure there was a pack of coyotes in that field, or worse – a bear.
I peered out from the barn door and looked at the field opposite and saw nothing. The dogs were sniffing around the floor of the barn for mice. I called Daphne outside, made her look at the field, but she was uninterested, so I knew there wasn’t a giant predator. I filled the horses’ buckets with grain and went downstairs, to the lower level of the barn where the horses’ stalls are, and filled their buckets. Usually this will create a stampede into the barn, but when I opened the barn door, the horses, who had tentatively wandered back up the hill, again, gaped above me in horror, and then galloped down the hill. At this point I was thinking ghost. There was clearly something unGodly hovering above my head that had spooked the horses. I looked up, but all I could see was the fuzzy fringe of the fur hat that I had worn up to the barn (it’s fake fur, relax). The hat that I sometimes wear in the city and to hockey games but never in the country. The hat that, I now realized completely altered my silhouette for the horses and what they saw, standing in the door of the barn, was a two legged beast with a bulbous fur head. Some kind of horse-eating manimal.
This is the hat. The photo was taken at the winter classic hockey game in Boston and I’m eating pizza, not horse, but how could my dear beasts know this? I was unrecognizable to them in the hat. Either that, or they were just refusing to be seen near me when I wear it, like the rest of my family.
Anyway, I took the hat off and called them. They stared at me from afar, trembling in fright. I tried to approach, but again they wheeled away and trotted off. I left the barn doors open, thinking they’d come in on their own once I left. Hours later, I returned to the barn, hatless, and only then, with some very gentle coaxing, was I able to get them to come into the warm barn, out of the cold, for their supper.
The horses have confirmed what my family has been telling me since I bought that hat. It’s scary.
But it’s so warm.
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This post and the responses are hilarious! The other “scary” stories and pictures were a hoot, too.
For the dog and animal lovers: The cover of this week’s New Yorker is doggy.
Hey Jip Lee — I visited the blog/website and then voted for Beauty’s Equine Rescue (Lady Bug’s story is amazing) — but I will say it wasn’t easy. If you could add a good link to the voting site that would be great — I had to go back and forth and search a few times, before I could cast my ballot.
Also a reminder for the Hot Water Rescue voting would help — I admit Ann, I have not been voting every day.
I’m going to post a link to the Shiloh Horse Rescue here
http://shilohhorserescue.rescuegroups.org/info/display?PageID=4095
located outside Las Vegas in Sandy Valley, NV. They are not entered in the contest for the $10,000 grants, but do amazing work nonetheless, and should be recognized.
Hi, everyone– It’s so great to see Ann’s horses and to know the wonderful love and care that she provides for them.
I know that everyone was voting recently for animal shelters that are trying to win a $10,000 grant. I want to post a link to a horse rescue facility that takes in starving, abused, and injured horses, and ask you to consider voting for this shelter. As with the small animal shelters, the stories are terrible and heart-rending. The major difference is that the horse expenses are astronomical.
The horse shelter posts a daily blog which makes it so easy to get attached to these wonderful animals. I was particularly taken with the young colt Baby Ray who was born premature and blind with cataracts. He was separated from his mother at about 6 weeks, then finally reunited with her after his rescue when she was also relinquished to the rescue center by the abusive owner.Baby Ray looked near starvation when he arrived, and now he is growing, playing with other rescued colts and has some sight restored after eye surgery at the University of Florida.
Here is a link to the blog. ttp://www.beautysequinerescue.org/daily_blog.htm.
Thanks to you and to Ann for drawing together such a great group. Wishing only GOOD KARMA for all. Jip
Great stories today ! I have none to contribute, have just been enjoying them. Thank you everyone. I’ve finished Rebecca, now I can’t wait for Sunday.
Off to bed for me…..I’ve been home recuperating from my knee surgery and tomorrow is my big day–it’s back to school day!! Good night all. Barbara
Aislinn . . . hilarious, I just got that — hearse. I’m a little slow on the uptake. Alan, Kim, Aislinn . . . y’all are too funny, and you need a rhythm section . . . you know, ba dum dum.
It is early for me, another hour until American Idol. . .
Rose Ward, here is a link you might appreciate. http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/31/magazine/31lives-t.html?scp=5&sq=modern%20love%20dog&st=cse
From the NYTimes entitled “The Dog Who Hates Me”
And, yes . . . we were an accident waiting to happen!
Funny . . . it was sadly, an Escort. But, I used to own a Pinto (horse – tri colored – my first horse) and a Pinto car (silver – it was my first car). And at the very same time, my sister had a Pinto car (orange) and my mom owned a Pinto Station Wagon – (white!) We were a four Pinto family.
Sigh, I’m REALLY dating myself!
Kim and Alan too funny, I got a good chuckle. Good night.
Perhaps it was a hearse, and the horse was British.
Or a Colt?
Christine, I loved your story!
or perhaps a Pinto?
Mary Lynn, was the car a Mustang?
Dave — Wow! and WOW!!! If there were prizes involved, please tell me you won. I believe Ann has needed assistance with sheep in her past . . . another hilarious story.
I’ve got a horse story, and I’ll try to make it short.
I used to ride “Foggy”, stabled in Golden Gate Park three times a week. I would drive up and park my car across from his stall. As soon as he saw me he would start nodding his head, and weaving, and knickering. I would get out of the car, open my hatchback and bring him some carrots as he continued his welcoming song and dance. Even though I knew the carrots were what he wanted, his show was still very sweet and endearing.
One day, they were working on the pavement in front of his barn, and I had to park my car out of his sight. I walked up expecting the same enthusiasm, and I got nothing . . . just some pricked ears and look that said “Where’s the car?”
In Foggy’s mind it wasn’t me who brought the carrots, it was the car. Come to think of it, it *was* the car who brought the carrots, and deserved the love. After all, I hung around and did all sorts of things to Foggy like groom him, tack him up, ride him, and clean his stall. The car didn’t do any of that stuff, but without fail it did deliver his heart’s desire. And who says horses aren’t smart?
For the record: The Bo Peep outfit was for a Halloween party. The sheep, which was the inspiration for the whole costume, was a gift from my “good” friends on my wedding night. They broke into our bridal suite and placed it lovingly on our bed. Luckily, my wife has a good sense of humor (of course she has to, right? She accompanied me to the party and even kept a straight face while I filled the car up with gas…self serve…on the way out that night). The sheep is still with us, inflated and positioned nicely in my basement work area. The kids haven’t asked about it…yet.
Dear Ann, love your generosity of spirit. Grammar police indeed! I think it came at the end of a long day of reading/proofing/editing stuff, good, bad, indifferent, and realizing that I’ve never seen you do that before. Hit me funny, or not so.
Loved the story of the horses and agree with most of the posters: maybe not such a great hat……… Had a similar one myself years ago and almost got killed in New Hampshire during hunting season. So please be careful!
Loved the hat story AND I love the hat. You can pull off the look Ann, and not everyone can do that. I avoid hats at all cost…once they are on that’s it..bedhead is the order of the day.
Umpteen years ago, in the 70’s (dating myself here) I bought a synthetic wig, when they first became cheap and fashionable. I wore it one day to the school where I worked. The kids thought I was a substitute and bad me, I let them think so! At least for a bit!
Thank you everyone for all the laughs.
Ann, funny story! I have to admit I thought you were going to write that there was a vicious animal on your property. We forget that there are things that animals don’t understand…like fashion! My cat always stares at the top of my head everytime I have my giant, pink velcro rollers in my hair.
Your story reminded me of another one that is kinda similar. One of my friends was giving herself a ’spa moment’ – it happened to be the first time she did it in the middle of the day while her two year old was still up instead of napping or sleeping for the night. She put her hair up, put on a headband to keep her bangs off her forehead and coated her face with a dark green avacado clay facial mask. The clay even went down her neck, but not on her ears. Her son called out to her as she was putting on the finishing touches. She called to him and hearing her voice he entered her bathroom. She was wearing her husband’s robe and the moment her son entered the bathroom he started to scream his head off. He ran out of the bathroom and ran around the house. Her kitchen, living room and dining room opened into each other so her son literally ran in circles. She called out to him and said, “It’s mommy! It’s mommy!” as she ran after him. He continued running and screaming. Realizing that she was the source of his fright. She ran to the bathroom and washed the clay off her face as fast as she could. She put her hair down, toweled dried her face and re-entered the living room. Her son still running, stopped when he saw her and said, “Mommy, mommy! There’s a monster in the house!!!” She felt so badly for what she had done and her husband scolded her for scaring the ‘baby’. He also told her that she scared the cr** out of him the first time he saw her like that on their honeymoon!
Rebecca is on Sunday? LOVE that movie, but don’t watch unless you’ve finished the book. Lawrence Olivier is Max De WInter!
Tammy that’s true, I believe Alan once discretely emailed me about a few big spelling blunders, which was very sweet. I suppose posting it on the comments is like shouting it across the room for all to hear. I like that blog writing is more casual and spontaneous, but I still don’t like to come across as a drooling idiot, so really don’t mind if somebody wants to correct my mistakes. Editors get paid to do that, yet people offer up their editorial services here, for free!
Ann that is a very sweet reply
A nice way to look at the situation too.
I would never point out your spinach in your teeth in front of the entire room, I believe I would have taken you to the side and told you quietly.
I didn’t noticed it though but I do on occasion get emails correcting some of my blog entries.
I like it when Ann commits the (very) occasional faux pas in her writing on the blog. That way I can look past the perfection (the hair, the figure, the teeth) and still love her.
Dearest Melissa 169a, no need to apologize. I often commit egregious spelling and grammatical errors on the blog. I post them quickly in the morning and if there’s a mistake, it’s like I have a big piece of spinach in my teeth and if everybody is too polite to say anything, I spend the day leering at everybody with these leaf-encrusted teeth. Will correct the offending pronouns forthwith.
Amanda, the mouse in the boot. Ick
Dave, you are ADORABLE.
I love your writing, Ann.
I did not know that the horses were visual, versus smelling things and people like doggies do. Then again… the hat may have made them ‘think’ they were being invaded…
I have things to post, but too pooped. Maybe the weekend. Or maybe during the weekend?.
This one class, teaching us how to critique literature.. but the professor skipped the definition of ‘literature’ and she proceeded to torture us (me), with examples of ‘damgling modifiers’. If she keeps going like this, I am going to start feeling more and more inadequate… only I will not tell her. Even Freud came into the ‘chat’ and it comes out that if I act rational, I am ‘repressing’ my natural tendencies. Say what?. And also, while at the ‘repressing bit’ I am also making myself be neurotic, seems like. What gives?.
I will see what she has to share this coming week and I am done thinking about the dangling anything!!.
Ann – This is a great story. You really had me going for a minute there – like on the edge of my seat. Especially after all the talk yesterday about vicious coyotes. How funny! I had no idea horses could be so “silly” or I guess you could say, easily spooked.
I’m still loving the hat – it’s a great hat!
Nice photo of the horses, too, with all the snow in the background. They are so beautiful.
Bev – thanks for the photo of cousin Steve the Footballer. He looks like quite an athlete. There are not many sports I enjoy watching, but soccer is one of them – especially World Cup. Loved the Spartacus story!
TCM (or, is it TMC?) is showing Oscar winning movies (going back as far as the 40’s) from now until Oscar night.
Linda S.
I am finally home and able to check Dave’s post (blocked at work) and I must say Dave I love the pic, you look fab. And Jane I reserved Rebecca at my library, can’t wait to watch. Thanks again for the info.
Oops. Poor Grammar Fine on it’s way. I meant to say “I have never gone to bed with an ugly woman, but I certainly have woken up to a few.” or is it “I have not gone to bed with an ugly woman, but I most certainly have woken to a few.”
The lady doth protest too much, me thinks.
Dave,
You remind me of one of my favorite country & western songs -”I ain’t never been to bed with an ugly woman, but I sure have woken up to a few
Dare I say, that’s one nervous looking sheep in your arms.
Ann, one piece of advice: Do not – I repeat, do not – wear that hat outside during hunting season here in Connecticut.
Dave, was there a specific event or occasion at which you wore that outfit? I sure as sh*t hope so.
Good to see Mark jumping into the conversation (and Dave, too). Not that I mind being far out-numbered by the women-folk here, but I do appreciate the company.
What a hilarious story!! My long gone husky/malamute once went out of his mind when I came out of the bathroom one night with a white facial mud mask on my face. He freaked out and wouldn’t let me in the room, so I gave up and washed it off after finally realizing I scared the crap out of him with the mask.
Lisa, “I”, too!
me shivers at thought of grammar police
Touché, Lisa.
That was very cute…they got scared, but I wonder why they did not recognize your voice? Joanie
Jane–i did not know there was a movie “Rebecca”, would you happen to know who is in it? I will be at a super bowl party and will not be able to see it. Loved the book, would like to see the movie too. thanks for the info.
Denis in the gold gown and Dave in his Bo Peep outfit-what a pair! Oh no, it is bad enough that I get critiqued in my language class and now to be monitored on the blog-WTF! Fashion Police fun, Grammar Police-not so much!
‘me’ like today’s blog entry!
Your right Jane, but man dressing can be apples and oranges. Denis is your more formal look with understated matching accessories, while Dave is a task oriented look. He does need to watch the hair ribbons, keep them both tied up. Good color choice tho.
So funny today! Love the Fashion Police. You just never know how a horse is going
to react to something new. I love the hat, Ann, and have one just like it in sheepskin. I bought it from Dave. So warm! Maybe I’ll wear it to the stable this afternoon & see if I scare the horses.
BTW, for those of you who have finished Rebecca, the movie is going to be on TCM this
Sunday afternoon.
I think the best looking man in a dress is Denis Leary in that gold gown. Wowzer.
Oh dear, we have a grammar police in residence today! Everybody, be on guard.
Ann/Colleen, today’s great line is…”eating to the stop watch, 32 chews per minute”, just makes me chuckle.
Dave,
You would have made a good Submariner. I’m just saying…
K.C. Who needs Rhinestones?..I use a BeDazzeler, ‘its the fashion craze of the season’!
Mary Lynn…. Touche! Marcus Carockus maybe but not Marcus Crassus.
Ann, your not the only one that can wear a hat like that to the city and look good…..eat your heart out.
http://tinyurl.com/ybmfjkp
Mark
Mark
Who knows…with Ann in that get up, they may have seen I approach.
Apologies, but
If they are in the lower field and see the dogs and I approach they come galloping up the hill and meet us at the fence:
PLEASE: see the dogs and ME approach…….
They see “me” approach, they don’t see “I” approach.
Hilarious, but reminds me that equines, for all their charms and talents, can be such complete urangatans. Try approaching them on crutches sometime (as I did once about 20 years ago, and Kentucky Derby winner Mine That Bird’s trainer, Chip Woolley did for the better part of 2009, both of us from riding indicidents, but his wasn’t a fall from a horse) – they’ll think you are The Devil Incarnate! Also fun watching them react of a four-in-hand (coach with four-horse hitch) if they haven’t seen one – completely freaks them out! Such antics! Thanks for all the memories.
Bulbous indeed
Dont feel bad Ann I have a suede jacket with a matching huge collar to go along with your hat, and I would so buy a muff to go along with it if I had to brave an outdoor match.
Faux fur and faux suede of course everyone
If you like fauxfur you should check out the store
http://www.fabulousfurs.com
I love that place
To me Ann and Denis have the same smile – in addition to looking alike.
Ann, it is remarkable (to me at least) how different you look when you smile with your teeth showing vs. your smirky, corners of the lips just turned up smile. You almost look like two different people to me (all in a good way). I wish I had a cool smirky smile.
Funny story too!
Dave, you’re stunning!
Ann, very suspenseful (and funny) post today. I really expected Big Foot to come out of the woods. It’s nice to know the horses are so diligent about reacting to “strangers.” (If I were you, I’d buy another hat just like that one and make slippers.)
Good laugh-out-loud reading today, aided by Dave’s generous gift of the link to the Little Bo Peep pic. Don’t know which I like better, Ann’s hat or Bo Peep’s bonnet. God only knows how the horses would have reacted to that sight coming at them.
Just kidding about Ann’s hat–I love it. And thanks, Dave, for adding to the fun this morning!!
Dave – how nice of you to zoom in.
Dave you are ADORABLE!!!!!!!!! BAAAAAA
Dave, love the pic!!! (So much could be said here, but I’m biting my tongue.)
Very funny and especially entertaining post today! LOL! So funny about the dear horses. What big sillies. Not even coming in to eat!
Really, Ann, it was quite an appropriate hat to be wearing on Groundhog Day. (winky face here)
KC, I love the idea of a row of these as a cross-country jump!
OK…I need to chime in here. I’m a big, bad biker (ther pedaling kind) and we can definitely look pretty!
http://www.twitpic.com/1173p4
Ann, if you ever get sheep…give me a call.
Scared the living day lights out of the horses, but the doggies weren’t phased a bit..HMMMM
Bev, I had a similar experience. Our neighbor had a pit bull named Ice…This dog hated me, my husband and neighbor would chat over the fence her tail goin a mile a minute. I walk out the door and the hound from hell was there.Hubby told me she was jealous…Itried to make friends. NOPE. Then we got my Dozer, and I wasn’t allowed near him either. Then she had puppies..PIT/SHARPEI…This is why you should have your pet spayed/neutered…his name was “Mugsy” whole nother story, but the name says it all
Very funny today.
Hmmm . . . so Spartacus learned to like oysters and snails.
Couldn’t resist.
Hi Ann, I was perusing your blog this morning, the hat thing, HILARIOUS!!!!! I needed a good laugh. (I don’t mean at your expense, but the way you write the story, so funny!). Wear your hat with pride, just stay in well “people-populated” areas while wearing it!! Hope all is well. Love Lisa
Once again, you’ve got me laughing out loud. My cat has a similar reaction when I come into the house wearing my hood. He gets all scaredy-cat slinky and backs up very slowly from the frightening unfamiliar scary thing in “his” house.
Ann – How hysterical is that! I honestly thought you were going to say you had a bear or a pack of something behind you. Geez – the vermin was upon your head. Funny.
Bev – faux pas – your a crack up.
What a cute story !! I like the hat–not everyone can pull it off, but I think it looks nice on you. And it looks very warm too, which is a requirement for me in winter. My family tells me that my warmest coat looks like a sleeping bag; don’t much care, because it’s warm and cozy. Keep the hat !! Just don’t wear it around the horses..they are too sweet to scare like that….
Great story! I love the hat, always thought it looked chic. But do you wear it while driving? Does is block your blind spot?
You mentioned your dogs sniffing for mice in your barn….last night when I went to take my dogs out I slipped my husband’s Lands End type boots on in the garage, took a few steps and wondered what was that lump? Something moved in the boot. When I flung it off a mouse ran out. Unfortunately it ran in my house so then there was a man hunt to find it. My family (all men) don’t understand why I don’t like cute little mice. But I bet if they would have shared a boot with one they would have screamed like a girl, too.
I heard on Saturday night that Mark’s other alias is “All Beef Patty.” It takes a real man to wear a wig!
Mark, I’m sure we can find a rhinestone undergarment with your name on it!
I second Ann – photos, please!
That story is absolutely hilarious! Thank you for that.
I love that hat!! I just want to run my hands through the fur (OK, don’t read anything naughty into what I just wrote!). But, I can see how the horses would be afraid-you shouldn’t wear your “city” hat in the country!
I think we are good enough friends now that I can be honest, I really don’t like the hat either, I am on “side family”. Hope you don’t block me.
How about you let us be the judge of that, Mark. Photos please.
Oiy you two! Sailors and Bikers can be pretty too you know…
: ), funny incident, Ann. I love the hat.
hehehehe, Sailors ….(eye roll)
So when people flee me in horror, it’s not me, it’s my clothing choices.
That’s what I learned from this.
Thank you.
Bev, ri..i..ight, they were dressed like ladies to train the dog….
Just kidding Mark (winky punctuation face)
I think the horses were not so much scared… More like recoiling in horror you made the faux pas of wearing your city hat in the country……. hahahah~!
I think the hat looks cute on you wherever you wear it…. Before I met Mark he had a big Rotweiller who who not take orders from a woman, the dogs name was Sparatcus, Mark and big biker friend of his called Snake used to put on ladies wigs and give commands to Spartacus until he learned to respect and take orders from a woman….. Well thats the excuse i got anyway….
I once had a horse afraid of bright helmet covers, but this story is SO much better!
I pledge to never wear a hat that looks like a fur bearing mammal to my barn.
I’m wondering if I can find a similar hat so I can then use it as a prop for a cross country jump. Because you never know when you may come across a badger/ fox/ bunny hiding inside a jump on a hunter pace or event! My horses will be so prepared!