Today I did a radio tour. I sat in a studio in Times Square and was interviewed by DJs and talk show hosts in radio stations all over the country.

Most of the interviewers were nice. The most interesting question? What's it like having Dennis Miller mouthing off around the house all the time. I said that I imagined it would be a living hell. Then I said that of course, I could only venture a guess, as I've never met Dennis Miller. The poor man had just spent ten minutes thinking he was interviewing Dennis Miller's wife. He began stammering his apologies and it became clear that he had no idea whose wife it was that he was interviewing and I felt so sorry for him that I ended up repeatedly apologizing to him for not being Dennis Miller's wife.

When I got home I told Denis - my Denis - Denis Leary about it and he insisted that I have met Dennis Miller and I said that wasn't Dennis Miller, it was Jay Mohr and Denis became very annoyed because I really never have any idea who anyone is. Once, I was seated next to Moby at a dinner party. This was years ago and I had spent the summer listening to a Moby CD that Denis had made me, but I had no idea what Moby looked like. So, like I said, at this dinner party, I was seated next to a very sweet, slightly nebbishy-looking guy who seemed a little out of his element. Meg Ryan was there, Jon Stewart, Nora Ephron. I think the party was for Barry Levinson. Anyway, my sweet dinner companion was concerned that there wouldn't be anything for him to eat as he was a vegan. He was just so quiet and unassuming that I realized he was probably quite overwhelmed by the dazzling luminaries in the room and I decided to take him under my wing. I asked one of the wait staff to prepare him a salad and then I explained to him who all the important people were. At one point I asked him what he did for work. He told me that he was a musician. "How nice," I said, imagining him in an orchestra pit, his upper lip quivering above a flute, or perhaps on a subway platform strumming on a mandolin. When we left the party, Denis and I shared a ride with Jon Stewart and his wife Tracey.

"What was Moby like," Tracey asked.
"Moby was there?" I asked, in all my innocence.

Yes, it was Moby whom I had lectured on the ins and outs of fame. And it was Moby whom I had urged to send Denis a "demo CD" of his music, as there was always the chance DENIS MIGHT LIKE IT AND USE IT ON HIS SHOW! Uggggg, I'm blushing bright red just typing this now.

I thought that the folks at Random House weren't selling enough books, so I decided to take matters into my own hands and help them move things along. Here I am pushing a cartload of my novel Outtakes From A Marriage from the warehouse.

I'm planning to push the cart up and down Canal Street and sell the books to tourists.

Just kidding! That's actually the load of books that arrived at The View today. Each and every audience member received a copy. I pushed the cart there from my house. I ordered all these books from Amazon to lower my sales ranking and then I had to do something with them.

Kidding.

But we did go on The View today. I was UNBELIEVABLY nervous. Had a little panic attack in the Green Room, Denis later told me that he didn't think I'd be able to walk to the stage. I was freaking out. Right before we went on, I ran to the bathroom and forgot that the sound guy had attached a microphone to my bosom which was attached to a wire that ran down my top which was attached to a square receiver thing that was clipped to the waistband of my pants. SO, when I unzipped my pants, guess where the receiver thing almost ended up? But I am deft of hand and snatched it up just before it splashed into The View's toilet. The sound guy rigged me back up and told me that the thing has fallen into the toilet many times. Great.

It was a blast. I love The View. Everybody was so unbelievably nice. They really chat you up in the Green Room to try to make you feel relaxed. When we were finished with the segment, Whoopi pulled me aside and said that she had read the book and that she had loved it and and was now desperate to read my first book! I can't tell you what it feels like to have Whoopi Goldberg gazing into your eyes and softly purring those words in that quiet, sexy voice that she has. It was heaven. I was dying.

Denis and I were on MSNBC this morning, talking about... one guess.

Before you click on the link, beware. It's long. The producer had told me that a member of Joe Scarborough's family had just had a premature baby so just before we went live, I told Joe about my book, An Innocent, A Broad,, which was about our premature baby and he thought I wanted to talk about that, because he's such a nice guy, and so Denis, mercifully managed to steer the whole thing back to Outtakes From a Marriage. You'll see. I'm a spaz. My hands go flying all over the place and my hair's a mess. You don't even need to watch it. You've seen enough, trust me.

Check out this interview I did with Rebecca Carroll from Paper Magazine last week.

I've met quite a few interesting people in the days since my book's publication date but Rebecca is definitely one of my favorites. We bonded over coffee. We talked about our kids, our moms, our husbands, how fragile we are sometimes, our writing, our New England childhoods. Oh, and we talked about my book a little too. Rebecca is FASCINATING and I hope to get to interview her when she starts promoting the book she has up her sleeve.

I have done a couple of book signings this past week. Here I am at the Barnes & Noble in Tribeca.



And here I am at my favorite bookstore, The Hickory Stick Bookshop in Washington Connecticut. That’s Fran Keilty, the shop’s owner standing next to me.

I never know what to write in a book I’m inscribing. My instinct/desire is to write something along the lines of: “Thank you so much for buying my book. I hope you like it, I’m really sorry if you don’t. Really, don't feel like you HAVE to buy it. But if you do, I can’t thank you enough! You’re so nice. I like what you’re wearing. Thanks again. I love you, Ann”

I recently asked a couple of writer friends what they write when they sign books. One said to always remember that the book you’re signing might end up for sale on a sidewalk one day. Then she said that a book she had once inscribed to her aunt turned up on eBay! The other told me that she simply writes: For (the person’s name) and then signs her name.

So on Saturday, I kept these authors' words in mind. No more offering love, praise, free sex to the book buyer. I simply signed my name. Okay, I used the word love a few times, but only for people I really do love - my daughter's former teacher, the guy who lives down the road whose name I forgot, everybody who said they loved my first book, a woman who bought TEN books as gifts because she thought I was so amusing on Morning Joe, and a woman who thought it was going to be Roxana Robinson signing books that day (she bought my book anyway, how could I not love her for that?)

Here's the link to the Los Angeles Times piece that ran today:
http://www.latimes.com/features/books/

Also, check out Choire Sicha's blog about my blog. Choire was the writer who interviewed me for the LA Times. I really like Choire, whose name is pronounced like this. He interviewed me at my house and insisted he didn't mind my dog placing her muddy muzzle on his lap all afternoon.

I don't usually post two blogs in one day, but one does not appear on television and in print on the same day, everyday (or at least this one doesn't.)

This morning, I was thrilled to discover that USA TODAY had run a very nice feature story about Outtakes From a Marriage.. Now, the photograph is perhaps not the most flattering, I usually leave those extra chins at home, but Donna Freydkin, the reporter who interviewed me for the piece wrote a lovely feature, so thanks Donna!

And, I also had the great pleasure of appearing on Better Connecticut with Scot Haney this morning. My fellow Connecticutites (Connecticutians? Connecticats?) know Scot as the meteorologist/comedian/vocalist extraordinaire from the Channel 3 morning news. Denis and I have been Scot Haney fans for years. How can you not love a man who bursts into song in the middle of a holiday forecast, repeatedly meanders into the traffic forecaster's shots and whose voice threatens to dissolve into sobs when he reads a report about a lost pet? So, when I saw that he now has a morning talk show, I asked my publicist if she could get me on, because I HAD to meet Scot Haney. Between bookings for The View, TODAY, Extra! MSNBC, etc, I received word from the publicist about Better Connecticut. First they didn't know if they could have me on. Then they booked me! And then, later the same week... they cancelled me! I don't know what Connecticut luminary bumped me from my coveted spot next to Scot Haney, but I decided I was out of luck. Then, last week, great news again! Better Connecticut would have me on their show after all!

So this morning I did it. It was a blast. I do love that Scot Haney!

I'm in my beautiful hometown of Marblehead, Massachusetts. I drove up yesterday because I'm doing a book signing today at the Spirit of 76 Bookstore, from 2:00-4:00.

This morning I went down to the landing and saw a lobster boat unloading its traps.

Then I walked down to the cove near my mother and stepfather's house. This is Brown's Island which sits right off the cove:

When the tide is low, as it is in this photo, you can walk right out to Brown's Island and barely get your ankles wet. When the tide comes in, it's a good long swim back to shore. When I was a teenager, I went to a few parties on Brown's Island and there were times that the tide rolled in with the night and when we were ready to leave, we were forced to whip off our clothes and swim to shore under the light of the moon. I have teenagers now, so I hasten to add that we NEVER consumed alcoholic beverages at these parties. What did we do? Oh, I'm sure we had a campfire, sing-alongs. The usual. Moon-Doggie would whip out his bongos and we'd all dance and get crazy. Good times.

This morning I'm heading into the city to tape an edition of NPR's "Fresh AIr" with Terry Gross. I'm a huge fan of Terry Gross and am very excited but also anxious about doing the show. I was told that I would be asked to read from my book and have spent the better part of the morning ruling out various excerpts. I can't read the opening chapter because there's too much dialogue and I'm no actress. Whenever I read dialogue aloud, I would like to adopt the persona of the character and try to say the words as she or he might, but just as I begin to form the words in my mouth, I am overcome by a dizzying self-consciousness and I switch course and read the language with all the pizzazz of a third grader reading a term paper about road construction. All the female characters sound like me and all male characters sound like me. The children sound like me and so do the drunkards, elderly and demented.
So I ruled out any parts that have too much dialogue. Then I ruled out some rather funny parts because, taken alone, they sound ... not so funny. Ruled out any parts that described fictitious famous people because I've run into trouble recently with people thinking I was describing real living famous people. The hairdresser and dermatology scenes might make the book sound too chicklit, while the flashbacks, taken out of context, make no sense. I finally narrowed it down to three words in the middle of the book: "Babies change you." I would like to read just those three words because, really, no truer words have ever been spoken.

A few months ago, I was introduced to a woman named Lisa Bannon. We were both picking up our dogs from the groomer and Lisa told me that her book club had read my first book, An Innocent, A Broad. My immediate reaction was to spell out my name for Lisa, as I was sure she was confusing me with some other author. My first book, from what I can see on my confusing royalty statements, couldn't possible have sold enough books for a whole book club to have read it. Did they share one book, passing it from one member to the other, I asked Lisa. DId one member read it aloud while the others sewed, like they did in "Gone WIth the Wind?" No, Lisa informed me, they had each bought and read and enjoyed my book.
So I told Lisa that I had a new book, Outtakes From a Marriage coming out and that if her book club wanted to read it, I would come and meet with them, and last night I did just that.

Here we are at the lovely Woodward House restaurant in Bethlehem, CT. The book club members are, from left, Lisa Henry, Marta O'Leary, Michelle Casey, Lisa Bannon, that's me and Kim Pugh on my left. I've actually known Kim Pugh for years (and suspect she's the reason they chose to read my first book, God bless her). Anyway, I can't remember the last time I've had such a fun night out with people I've never met before. One of the Lisas has a son at Yale and another at Trinity. The other Lisa has a Dutch Warmblood stallion that she keeps in her backyard! You have to be a horse person to understand how cool that is. I was full of questions about the logistics of keeping a 1200 lb testosterone charged, ungelded beast and she told me about her feeding and exercise program and also shared the fascinating yet disturbing fact that stallions are able to pleasure themselves, thus easing the sexual tension for everybody. Michelle, who is moving to Cape Cod today, has a beautiful 4 1/2 year old son named Samuel who was born in Ethiopia. Kim, who looks young enough to be in college, has a son Jesse who is starting high school. And the beautiful Marta is so sweet that she was blinking back tears while Michele discussed her moving plans, because she hates goodbyes. I enjoyed these women so much, and they said such wonderful things about my books, that I suddenly hated goodbyes too, and if it was up to me we would still be sitting in that cozy dining room talking about me. Thanks for a wonderful evening Lisa, Kim, Marta, Lisa and Michelle!

I was very pleased to wake up this morning and learn that Outtakes From a Marriage is listed as #1 in today's New York Daily News list of "sizzling beach reads."

Yesterday I learned how to use the recording equipment for my new NPR radio show, In House.. Marshall Miles of WHDD patiently showed me how to use the digital recorder and the editing equipment. He made it all look so easy. I admit it was hard to pay attention as I kept daydreaming about all the fascinating people I was going to interview, and how quickly the word was going to spread about In House and its insightful host, Ann Leary. I thought about how I now need to fashion a radio voice and how I no longer need to worry about my hair. I was sent home with my recorder and microphones and later, I tried to interview my daughter as she drove us to dinner, but I couldn't even get the recorder to record.

I went to Marblehead the other night to meet with my sister's book club.

Here they are, the members of the ...I forget the name of the book club but it's an abbreviation that stands for something naughty. Can you believe how tan and gorgeous and sporty-looking they all are? I felt like a sickly, pale-faced consumption victim in their midst. See if you can guess which one is my sister:

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Ooops, the photo's too big and it cut the club in half. Here are the rest of the gals:

I posted this while I was doing my book tour last June.

Today I did a radio tour. I sat in a studio in Times Square and was interviewed by DJs and talk show hosts in radio stations all over the country.

Most of the interviewers were nice. The most interesting question? What's it like having Dennis Miller mouthing off around the house all the time. I said that I imagined it would be a living hell. Then I said that of course, I could only venture a guess, as I've never met Dennis Miller. The poor man had just spent ten minutes thinking he was interviewing Dennis Miller's wife. He began stammering his apologies and it became clear that he had no idea whose wife it was that he was interviewing and I felt so sorry for him that I ended up repeatedly apologizing to him for not being Dennis Miller's wife.

When I got home I told Denis - my Denis - Denis Leary about it and he insisted that I have met Dennis Miller and I said that wasn't Dennis Miller, it was Jay Mohr and Denis became very annoyed because I really never have any idea who anyone is. Once, I was seated next to Moby at a dinner party. This was years ago and I had spent the summer listening to a Moby CD that Denis had made me, but I had no idea what Moby looked like. So, like I said, at this dinner party, I was seated next to a very sweet, slightly nebbishy-looking guy who seemed a little out of his element. Meg Ryan was there, Jon Stewart, Nora Ephron. I think the party was for Barry Levinson. Anyway, my sweet dinner companion was concerned that there wouldn't be anything for him to eat as he was a vegan. He was just so quiet and unassuming that I realized he was probably quite overwhelmed by the dazzling luminaries in the room and I decided to take him under my wing. I asked one of the wait staff to prepare him a salad and then I explained to him who all the important people were. At one point I asked him what he did for work. He told me that he was a musician. "How nice," I said, imagining him in an orchestra pit, his upper lip quivering above a flute, or perhaps on a subway platform strumming on a mandolin. When we left the party, Denis and I shared a ride with Jon Stewart and his wife Tracey.

"What was Moby like," Tracey asked.
"Moby was there?" I asked, in all my innocence.

Yes, it was Moby whom I had lectured on the ins and outs of fame. And it was Moby whom I had urged to send Denis a "demo CD" of his music, as there was always the chance DENIS MIGHT LIKE IT AND USE IT ON HIS SHOW! Uggggg, I'm blushing bright red just typing this now.

To finish off this week of celebration, I have chosen to broadcast Jimi Hendrix, playing The Star Spangled Banner on his guitar. I have watched this youtube video several times, as I am quite fascinated by him. I hear a movie "bio-bic" is in the works about his short life. Anyway, about the video. A few moments in, you'll see Jimi playing the guitar with what appears to be his..his..tongue. Also, I would KILL for that outfit. I love the fringe poncho, and the flared pants. Are they velvet? Not so wild about the Earth Shoes. I don't see that look every coming back. Well, here it is. I love the "rockets red glare, the bombs bursting in air" sound effects. Then the little rendition of "taps". So cool. Enjoy. But don't watch it too many times. You'll feel a little stoned.